But throughout life get brittle and dry
We hide ourselves
Let our walls come down
We hide ourselves
Let our walls come down
Words bring us down
Our minds slowly become hypnotize
But it's the yin and the yang that balances us out
They ways of the Tao that can bring us to peace
Being humble and calm
Not fearing for long
Allowing your body to be drifted through the air
Let your heart lead the way
And open your eyes
To see a world so grand and filled with delight
I really like how you added some repetition within the lines because it creates more rhythm and flow. You picture also ties it all together because it shows how someone can embrace life the way it is.
ReplyDeleteI like how you made the lines short so that it flowed really well with what you're trying to say.
ReplyDeleteI loved your first stanza it really captures your attention and sets the mood for the entire poem.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the original features of your poem, the concept of age making us fools, and connect those problems with the way the Tao can solve them.
ReplyDeleteI really like how well your poem flows and the picture to match it is really great.
ReplyDelete