Aspire to succeed
and you will fail
Aspire to be a mystery
and you will be revealed
Aspire to be eternal
and you will die
The Tao is the energy
it controls our being
our actuality
When we give without receiving
live without possessing
be one with the universe
and go with the energy
The energy will return to us
The vibes will harmonize
and the Tao will return
I like your use of repetition, and the way you use contrasting words that show the conflicting nature of the Tao. Also, I also liked the way you ended it with returning to the Tao.
ReplyDeleteI really liked how your poem truly brought in all the elements of Tao. Also I liked you said the Tao will return to us when we are at harmony.
ReplyDeleteI like your message about going with the flow and giving to receive, etc. My favorite part of your poem is the first part where you say, "Aspire to succeed
ReplyDeleteand you will fail; Aspire to be a mystery, and you will be revealed..." etc.
I thought your poem showed the Tao's language and meaning very well, the themes of energy and being one with the Tao were very clear throughout the stanzas.
ReplyDelete