Smokey Goddess
I once met a girl who was sad
But she wasn’t just sad
She was Pensive too
She was so sad,
That her smile disappeared
Replacing her lips with a line of roses
Regrets and dark intuitions
Color her hair a raven shade
She is driven
Not by happiness
Not by anger
But by her lack of judgment
A blessing and a curse
A thick cloud of smoke
The smoke that masks flaws
Everything was beautiful to her
She trusted everything
Which made her vulnerable
She fell in love with everything
She fell in love with everyone
She told me
That the men she met
Had held all of her emotions
In their handbags
Handbags that jostled around
In the end it broke the girl
Her tears watered the roses
The roses that made her pensive
Roses of which grieved her smile
My favorite aspect of your poem was how you used metaphors and similes to convey her struggles uniquely. My favorite line was "Handbags that jostled around", because it clearly demonstrates how her emotions were just played with and uncared for.
ReplyDeleteI really like your use of repetition and how throughout the poem you stay true to the theme of roses. I'd say my favorite part is the stanza about the handbags. It is really pretty and I can see the image of it.
ReplyDeleteI liked your use of repetition and symbolism to convey your message. In particular, the lines "Her tears watered the roses / The roses that made her pensive / Roses of which grieved her smile" really stood out to me. They repetition really drives home the point and leaves the reader with a lasting impression.
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