For Just Awhile
Pippity pippity pippity
A newly opened can of pop
Accompanied by gas bubbles
Enjoyed the idle back and forth
Language lounged like a cat
Enjoying the afternoon sun
Pippity pippity pippity
The clouds passing by
Blocked the sun
For just awhile
Pippity pippity pippity
The pop was forgotten
Scuffing sounds
Language fell at its own throat
Scratching and biting
Possessed by anger
For just awhile
Pippity pippity pippity
The clouds moved away
Would they pass again?
For just awhile
Pippity pippity pippity
Apologizing to itself
The pop was downed
And tossed
And language was awkward
Tripping over itself
But once more
Pippity pippity pippity
“Hello, hello!”
Language lounged, content
For just awhile
I like the repetition of the words "Pippity pippity pippity". It's sound and repetition at once!
ReplyDeleteI love the lighthearted simplicity of this poem, how you took one simple moment and expanded it. You also have great use of sound in your poem.
ReplyDeleteFavorite line:
"Accompanied by gas bubbles
Enjoyed the idle back and forth
Language lounged like a cat
Enjoying the afternoon sun"
I like clever imagery in the way you personified the fizz.
I like your use of alliteration, onomatopoeia, and repetition. My favorite lines are "Enjoyed the idle back and forth" and "Language fell at its own throat".
ReplyDeleteI really like the way you use the pop to tell another story! It's a cool way of treating a story where you don't want to divulge the details.
ReplyDeleteI liked the repetition of the line "pippity pippity pippity" in each stanza. My favorite lines are "and language was awkward/tripping over itself."
ReplyDelete